Illness. Pain. The mind wants solutions… suggesting… trying… what if this, what if that…. it wants to escape the body pain… now! It’s so persistent in its quest to stop this actual ‘what is’ state. Jibber-jabbering away wanting to be helpful. I’m sitting here watching it do its thing… creating fear, scary thought, anxiety stories, all kinds and varieties of stories. I used to resist the mind and the body and the stories, but that just kept me tethered even more. So, I watch it do its thing. Jibber-jabber… when will it?… what if?… stop me in my tracks writhe, grimace involuntarily; disapprove of it as I’m sending it love and approval; call out to Uriel, Lester, god god god, a friend… what a cacophonous symphony. Not a distraction. Not to be denied, ignored, or by-passed. But to have the courage to dive into the apparent chaos where peace, pain, noise, silence, whatever-ness, and all of it resides. This is the challenge of illness… and life.
Courage to be with all of it, and to let it be all of what it is. Until it isn’t.
Q: How does one fall out of love? I’ve been in love with the same woman for most of my adult life. [She does not know and is happily married with children.] I welcome suggestions.
Mu: Fall in love with yourself. The rest will fall into place.
Q: No… I’m not worthy.
Mu: If you really believe that, you are blocking your own blessings. When we free our mind of the self-defeating conditioned silliness, we liberate ourselves from our suffering. We are not here to be martyrs. We do not need to earn love. Just BE love. Everyone holds the key to their own self-imposed prison cell. Having the courage to use it is a choice.
The question as I see it, is why choose suffering and self-loathing over love and freedom? What’s the payoff?